


Foolish Dreams and Foolish Children

by Luna_Cat16



Category: Fate/Zero
Genre: F/M, Fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-14
Updated: 2014-12-14
Packaged: 2018-03-01 12:52:48
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,752
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2773682
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Luna_Cat16/pseuds/Luna_Cat16
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"You really like stars, don't you?"</p>
<p>Tokiomi and Aoi go to one of his family's more secluded estates, and he decides to take her somewhere special one night. Takes place a short time before their marriage.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Foolish Dreams and Foolish Children

**Author's Note:**

> so fun fact if you are my favorite character you will love space there is no escaping this. this actually came out of me having a slew of tokiomi/akasha feelings and while most of them were super sad this one was cute so i decided to be self indulgent and write it out. if you listen to Once Upon A Memory from the To The Moon soundtrack i assure you that this will feel 10 times more sappy than it actually is and maybe also make you cry once you remember how much mage society and tokiomi turned their relationship into a trainwreck ~8 years later

"How much farther?"

"We're almost there."

Tokiomi turned his head and gave Aoi a reassuring look. As much as she loved strolling around at night, this must have seemed pointless to her. Although earlier he said he wanted to show her something, there were no promising results from the winding, uphill trail. The old stone path in front of them was barely visible, and huge trees obstructed the sky, creating an inky black veil around them. There was nothing to see, so why would they be here? Despite her probable doubts, she still trailed close to him, making sure she didn't lose sight of his figure.

But like he said, their destination wasn't very far at all. Up ahead he could make out a break in the woods, an opening of dark indigo that seemed to shine compared to the murk they were in. "There! I told you it was close." They picked up the pace, stepping through the opening and finally freeing themselves from the murky forest.

"Tokiomi, this is..."

They were both speechless. Father said their destination would have a beautiful view, but Tokiomi didn't expect this. The clearing, which gradually sloped upwards to the top of the hill, was covered in soft grass, teeming with small purple and white flowers. But the earth was nothing compared to the sky. By taking a trip to one of his family's more secluded estates they escaped one of modern civilization's greatest flaws. Without the rampant light pollution, the great black expanse revealed its treasures before their eyes. Bright, sparkling stars dotted the sky, with only the black gap of the new moon interrupting their spread. The two young adults' eyes were wide and glittering, and Aoi turned to him, her face positively beaming. "Let's go up to the top, Tokiomi!"

She almost broke into a run, and Tokiomi picked up his own pace. Neither ran -- their respective manners and self-consciousness restrained them, but they reached the top of the hill soon enough. "Aah, there's no patio up here?" He sighed, looking out at the uninterrupted swathe of grass and flowers. No chairs, no covering...Where would they sit?

"That's alright! The grass looks soft enough." When she saw Tokiomi's look of confusion and brief panic, she couldn't help but laugh. "You'll be fine. It's not like we're wearing these clothes anywhere after this, so they can get a little dirty."

After some hesitation and grumbling he finally lowered himself to the ground, stretching his legs out at a cautious rate and keeping his hands off of the grass. "Father said this was a garden..." Of course, gardens in his mind referred to rather extravagant, well-managed exhibits of floral architecture, complete with a gazebo and multiple places to sit down, specifically places that weren't on the ground.

Aoi pressed a finger to her chin in thought. "Well, it could have been once. Maybe they decided to leave it alone a long time ago." That would explain the soft grass, and the out of place flowers. "I don't mind though, this place really is beautiful. Thank you, Tokiomi."

"I'm glad you like it." That was a bit of an understatement. He knew she'd like it. He picked this spot out based on her interests, so it was only natural that she'd have some appreciation. Still, her wide delighted smile, and the way her feet swung back and forth, and the way she looked as if she could break out into cheerful humming at any moment all managed to fill him with a sort of indescribable warmth. It managed to make him smile too, despite the damp grass continuing to stain his khakis.

They sat there for a while without speaking, watching the stars glitter uninterrupted by clouds or even planes. At least, Tokiomi did. Once he looked at the stars he couldn't take his eyes off of them. At home he could see the night sky, but here it was so much more vivid. This was what Father meant by 'looking at infinity', didn't he? He really could gaze forever and beyond.

...Being away from modern society was such a nice thing.

"You really like stars, don't you?"

The sudden break in the quiet atmosphere almost made him jump, and he turned towards Aoi with wide eyes, though the surprise faded once he comprehended the question. "Yes, in a way. I thought you did too?"

"They're pretty, but..." Her hand softly patted the grass beneath it. "I enjoy looking at our earth more than at others."

"Mmm." He nodded, turning his head back up towards the stars. "When I was younger I thought the stars looked like a bunch of shining gemstones."

"Really?"

"Of course, Father told me that was ridiculous. Science had already proven they were just huge orbs of fiery gases, so comparing them to anything else was silly."

"But they still look like gems, don't they?"

"...Yes, they do."

He sighed, and then the conversation paused, with the two of them resuming their stargazing for another moment. Then, with considerable hesitation, he spoke again. "That's not the only reason I like them, though."

Aoi turned towards him, clearly curious at his sudden openness. He could certainly be very talkative, but this was new for her. "Hm?"

"Akasha."

She gave him a puzzled look. "What does that have to do with the stars?" Akasha was, as far as she knew, just related to Magic.

"Well..." He blushed slightly, with the realization that he was about to make a rather personal confession slowly dawning on him. "Akasha is infinite. It's the origin of everything in the universe, beyond earth and everything else. So the place most like it is --"

"Space?"

"Yes! Everything in it is so vast and incomprehensible. After all, who could ever know what the inside of a star looked like, or travel into a black hole? Apparently, there's a planet made entirely of diamonds as well! And at the same time, it's all so beautiful, like an elegant mixture of power and mystery." He paused, nervously rubbing the back of his neck with his hand. "When I was little, I thought that maybe, if I became good enough, I could do things like control cosmic fire or summon meteors. It was...immature, but Father said that I could do all of that and more if I reached the Root. So I worked even harder because of that!"

There was another pause as his face turned red, and his eyes looked downwards. Finally, he began to stammer.

"And...Maybe I...still want to ah, summon a black hole, or a field of colorful, cosmic...energy..."

Aoi giggled, and even if she  _most likely_ wasn't making fun of his horribly immature fantasies, he still felt tempted to hide his face in his hands right then and there. If she even dared to say something like 'how cute', then he'd be out of there right away.

But thankfully, she didn't. "So if you reach Akasha, or the Root, then you'll be able to control...anything?"

"Yes?" Finally, back into a more comfortable topic. "It means being able to perform miracles that no one can replicate, so in a way you could control anything. You could also know anything, too. So once I reach the Root, I can become the greatest magus the world has ever seen."

"The greatest? I thought you were already pretty good!"

"Not quite." 

_Practically useless, actually._

Still, he accepted the compliment, and kept his own thoughts silent. Aoi seemed dissatisfied by his response, but she respected the brevity of it and didn't press any further. Thank goodness for that. There were some things he couldn't tell anyone, not even her. How could he say that this was more than just a dream, a distant goal in the far future? How could he ever articulate that without the Root, all the late nights he spent, all of the lessons he learned, all of his  _existence_ , would literally just be stepping stones for (hopefully) far more capable progeny? There was nothing bad about that, of course, but at the same time, he wanted to be the one. He just felt, deep down, that despite everything, he was more qualified and deserving than anyone to reach it.

But how could he say that? He could barely figure out his own feelings half of the time.

Though, now that he thought of it, there was something important he had to ask her.

"Aoi?"

"Yes, Tokiomi?"

"They say that those who reach the Root and touch it -- not just reach it, because you can obtain Magic just by that, but  _touching_ it is where you truly 'reach God', in a way -- they disappear."

"Disappear?" She was starting to look concerned now.

"They stop existing in this world. But no one really knows that. The question is..." He took a deep breath, and looked right at her with his icy, inhuman, but also  _worried_ eyes.

"If I obtained Akasha, and disappeared...would you be alright with that?"

For a moment, there was silence. Aoi's expression grew troubled, and she looked down in thought.

"Well, I would be sad, Tokiomi. You wouldn't be here anymore."

Ah. He expected that response. It was only natural that if she liked him, she wouldn't want him to go --

"But I would also...be happy for you."

"Happy?"

"Yes. Because even if you weren't around, I'd know that you'd be happy, wherever you went. Your dream would come true, right?"

"...Ah." He looked downwards. That was an unexpected response. But it was so like Aoi, wasn't it? Always concerned for others, especially him. It was a response he  _wanted_ , too. They'd been courting each other for a while now, but with the way it was going, the idea of hurting her with something like that was becoming unthinkable. He needed to know that she understood -- understood what his responsibilities as a magus were, and what they would mean. And with this, he felt a lot better.

With nothing left to be said, they both looked back up at the sky again. They were going to have to head back soon, as they did both need to actually sleep, but for now, this was fine. Staring at the bright stars on a warm summer night, hearing nothing but the occasional chirping of insects and each other's breath, feeling the healthy, damp grass in their hands, and the sudden warmth and pressure of Aoi's hand slowly sliding over his --

This was fine.

**Author's Note:**

> @people wondering if the 'would you be alright with that' was a subtle reference to what kariya asked aoi in the novels: yes. yes it was.


End file.
